11 Craziestamerican Horror Storysex Scenes All Time
' American Horror Story ' isn't much for happy endings, and that includes the show's numerous, wildly diverse sex scenes. In four short years of AHS, there's basically no untouchable subject that it hasn't given a good groping -- including bestiality, necrophilia, incest, and tupperware sex parties.
And hey, that's not to mention last night's (January 7) insane scene where Neil Patrick Harris had a bone-fest while his ventriloquist dummy watched . Yikes!
But on a series that doesn't hold back on the gore and gross-outs, where the physical act of love is as likely to end in a bloodbath as it is in a post-sex shower, there are still a handful of moments that really stand out. Below, we've rounded up the wildest 'American Horror Story' sex scenes in the history of the show.
- Ben Harmon and... Ben Harmon
The infamous scene in which Dylan McDermott sobs and wanks at the same time (onto a baby changing table, just to make things extra weird) is still the least sexy sex scene ever to grace AHS, or any other show, for that matter.
- Madison Montgomery and Franken-Kyle
It starts with strangulation and ends with an against-the-wall schtupping, but what really takes this scene over the top is that both participants in the act are technically dead.
- Franken-Kyle and his mom
A reassembled Kyle comes back from the dead with another guy's private parts, and his mother instantly knows the difference, for the worst possible reasons.
- Jimmy and the Tupperware Party
He doesn't even wash his hands between housewives, you guys. GROSS.
- Moira the Maid and Joe Escandarian
On a show like this, it's not a question of whether some hapless bastard will get his wiener bitten off, but when .
- Honeymoon of Horrors
We're assuming that Bloody Face was as grossed out as we were by this particular pre-copulation move, and that that's why he kindly relieved Adam Levine of his arm, so he couldn't do it again.
- Vivien and the Rubber Man
The full-body latex sex suit is actually the least freaky thing about what's happening here.
- Zoe and the Doomed Frat Boy
It's just business as usual for this young witch, using her Vagina of Death to rape and kill a comatose teenager. Ho, hum.
- Queenie and the Minotaur
Because when a half-man, half-bull monster comes to your house to kill you, of course the solution is to try to have sex with it. OF COURSE IT IS.
- Elsa's Last Film
That awkward moment when you think you're making an ordinary porno, and then a couple of dudes with pantyhose over their heads come out and cut your legs off with a chainsaw.
- Bloody Face and Lana Winters
Baby needs colostrum! And we need a million showers and a memory-erasing device, please and thank you.