9 Things Your Cat’s Butthole Has Definitely Touched

9 Things Your Cat S Butthole Has Definitely Touched

You love that cat. And even though half the time it stares at you as though it wants you dead, the truth is ... it loves you too. But just like you and me, it's an animal that poops and doesn't wear underpants.

The difference is, you put your head down in lots of places that you don't put your butt. Your cat, however, is not bound to the rules of society or common decency -- it would just as soon as sit on your face and do the wiggle worm. Simply put, your cat's butthole has been on lot of things around your home, and you need to recognize them instead of pretending it's all in your imagination.





  1. Your Couch Tony Sam

    Duh, this one's a no-brainer. In fact, we're willing to bet even your butthole has been on the couch. The only difference is you occasionally put soap and water on yours. So the next time you decide to sprawl out of the sofa, just keep in mind who else's little dumper was on it.

  2. Your Pillow Tony Sam

    Yep, you go through all that trouble to wash your face at night, only to put your face right on the pillow that your cat uses as a bed for its dirty stinker the moment you go to work. Good night!



  3. Your Kitchen Table Tony Sam

    'You mean the place that I eat?' Exactly. If you set the table, you might as well just stick your knife and fork up your furry feline's Hershey Highway. Maybe you don't mind eating off a table that's essentially a flat litter box, but your date might, so maybe don't bring it up.

  4. Your Homework/Paperwork Tony Sam

    Whether you're still in school or have joined the workforce, your cat has definitely signed off on the pile of papers on your desk. You get an 'A' for effort, kitty gets a 'B' for 'butt' (and 'bacteria').

  5. Your Other Cat Shira Gal/Flickr

    ...or your dog, or whatever. Scent is very important to animals. Remember that when they give you kisses later.



  6. Your Keys Tony Sam

    If you set it down, then your cat's butt has been on it: keys, pencils, watches, necklaces, the whole shebang. Your cat thinks it's the little things that count, and their butthole is just the right size.

  7. Your Baby (If You Have A Baby) Glenn Buckholtz/Flickr

    Cats don't care! They will sleep or sit on anything comfortable, even if it is your child. Maybe those nasty germs are good for the kid's immune system development? We're no doctors.

  8. Your Favorite Clothes

    It's not a night on the town unless you're wearing a sexy, feline-befouled outfit, right? Well, go get 'em, and if anyone asks what perfume you're wearing, then you can just say, 'It's Fluffy.'

  9. You Getty Images

    You're the weirdo who loves snuggling with your cat so much, in case you forgot. Ugh.