Thinkjackassis Nuts Meet Wild
They are four lifelong friends, possessing a combined eight arms, eight legs, and 39 fingers — and according to some, not a brain between them.
People have called the Dudesons freaks, stuntmen, budding stars and even defendants. But just make sure you don't call any of them a Jackass.
'We started before 'Jackass,' ' insisted Jarppi, the nine-fingered quasi-leader of the Finnish madmen. 'But with these kinds of things, boys are always being boys, and everybody's been doing things like this way before there was any television shows.'
The fact that boys often enjoy alcohol-fueled anarchy is inarguable; what is up for debate, however, is how many have considered placing their privates into a mousetrap for a good time.
'It's all about negotiation,' Jarppi said, listing two of the most memorable 'stunts' in 'The Dudesons Movie,' a new DVD that, along with a Spike TV show, will bring the quartet to America. 'I actually talked Jukka into putting his [privates] into the mousetrap; it was kind of a trick. Jukka wanted to throw darts at my stomach, and I told him, 'Yeah, you can do that, but only if you stick your [privates] in there.' '
'I still have nightmares from that mousetrap haunting me,' laughed Jukka, the self-described 'Showman' who, along with 'Bone-breaker' HP and Jarno — 'The Brains' — make up the freaky foursome.
'We all met in elementary school, in fourth grade,' explained Jarppi. 'We got separated, actually, from being in the same class.'
Now, the four have turned a lifetime of grade-school debauchery and Arctic Circle time-passing into a career filled with skateboarding and snowboarding videos, Finnish TV programs, rock-concert appearances and DVDs. You'd be hard-pressed to find a group of guys who laugh as hard, or as often, as these wild boys — who keep their cameras running 24/7 — and you'd have an equally hard time not cracking up yourself, as they profess their love for the honorary fifth Dudeson: Britney, the group's pet pig.
'We can't even compare to a 600-pound pet pig,' Jarppi replied when asked which of the group members is the toughest. Their beloved swine, who the daredevils adopted when he/she was a baby (they claim the animal is a transsexual), was named after Britney Spears and given free reign within their shared home. 'Our Britney is a way better singer,' he added.
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'Now I can't hitchhike,' Jarppi sighed. 'I've tried it a couple of times, but nobody ever stops.'
One person who would definitely never stop, even if Jarppi had both thumbs, is the next-door neighbor they've been warring with since their youth. 'Everybody has that one neighborhood bully ... that is always yelling and screaming at everybody and doesn't let the kids play,' explained Jukka. 'Mr. Hitler [as the group has dubbed their adversary] was that guy when we grew up; he was always picking on us. Years and years after that, we decided to find out where he was living and get our revenge.'
In their movie, the boys begin their vendetta by defecating in the mailbox of their nagging former neighbor; later, they return for an elaborate gag that creates a giant, camouflaged pit in the middle of his driveway. 'We can't talk too much about that, because we got caught and had to settle it outside of court with him,' Jukka explained.
Jarppi revealed part of their legal agreement mandated that they had to leave their stunt victim alone, pay ,000 for wrecking his car and disguise his identity. 'He got what he deserved. That is part of the contract, that we have to cover his face,' he said. In the film, the man's face is replaced with an image of Hitler's likeness.
After all the flipped-over cars, naked ice-water diving and fish-tied-to-firecrackers expeditions into outer space (don't ask), 'The Dudesons Movie' concludes with the following message of thanks: 'The Dudesons had to pay Mr. Hitler ,000 to cover the damages. So thanks for buying this DVD! We really need the money!'
The only thing worse than living next door to the Dudesons, however, is living with them. If you dare to fall asleep, there's a good chance that you'll get a rude awakening from a fire extinguisher, bucket of ice or baseball bat to the crotch. Jukka, the victim of the bat incident, offered the following advice: 'Always remember to lock the door if possible. If not possible, sleep on your stomach.'
With Steve-O and Bam Margera both appearing in their movie, there's no doubt that the 'Jackass' guys tip their vomit-filled hats to the Dudesons (see ' 'Jackass' Director Says 'Number 2' Is Even Filthier' ). And with any luck, Jukka will someday get another of his idols to star in a future stunt.
'[David] Hasselhoff has done it all,' beamed Jukka, who specializes in vehicular chaos, as a tribute to his hero. 'He's been in 'Baywatch,' he's the 'Knight Rider,' and he is an amazing star in music videos. I actually have met him, and I taught him how to say 'Great-Grandfather of Satan,' ' he said, referring to a common, very forceful Finnish profanity, 'and it's the most powerful word in the Finnish language.'
If the Dudesons could persuade the actor to star in one of their stunts, Jukka hopes to fulfill a dream that is perhaps shared by non-extreme stuntmen. 'I'd like to hit Hasselhoff in the [privates],' he laughed. 'That's what we call 'making friends.' '
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