This Brutalgame Thronestakedown Will Make You Think Twice About Fan Favorite Character
Lots of ' Game of Thrones ' fans love Davos Seaworth, the proud and loyal soldier in Stannis Baratheon's service. And why wouldn't they? Despite a checkered past as a pirate and smuggler, Davos is one of the most honorable men we know in Westeros, with every single one of his moves motivated by his fealty to Stannis, including the desire to learn how to read.HBO
What's not to love, right? Cue the Davos detractors, who can now rally behind a pretty amazing takedown of the Onion Knight. Tumblr user George R.R. Martin -esque write-up, told from the character's perspective, intended to summarize 'every Davos chapter.' And honestly? It's not wrong.
Serious Jones writes:
'I can’t let Stannis down,' Davos thought to himself after f---ing everything up yet again due to his abject lack of charisma or likability. He found himself reaching for his pouch o’ finger-bones, only to remember that he lost them when he f---ed up during the Battle of the Blackwater. That reminded him of his many dead sons, which made him very sad, though he did not forget his duty. He never forgot his duty to Stannis, who had spared his life.
'I must never forget that Stannis spared my life,' Davos thought, clenching what remained of the fingers on his left hand. Stannis had removed the first joint of the fingers on his left hand as punishment for his crimes as a smuggler. Stannis was a hard man, but just. He reached for his pouch o’ finger-bones, only to remember that he lost them. He missed the bones that he kept in a pouch around his neck. They were his luck, and now he had no luck.HBO
'Even without my luck, I must not let Stannis down. He could have taken more than the first joints of my left hand, yet he gave me a lordship,' Davos thought. Even though he earned a lordship, four of his sons would never know about it, as they died on the Blackwater, where Davos lost his pouch o’ finger-bones, which he considered his luck. Davos took a moment to remember his dead sons. 'I miss my dead sons,' Davos thought. 'Perhaps they would have fared better if they had my luck. Though I lost my luck on the Blackwater. Even then, I must not let Stannis down.' Instinctively, Davos reached for his pouch o’ finger-bones, which he considered his luck.HBO
Yeah, that's pretty brutal.
It's also pretty fair. In the books, Davos thinks about Stannis, his dead sons, and his missing bag o' bones all the time . It's all a bit much. Combine those traits with the fact that Davos' role in the ongoing struggle of would-be kings, queens, dragons and ice monsters is a bit left of center (to put it nicely), and you start to see why some people are down on the Onion Knight.
But! Does it count for nothing that Davos is one of maybe eleven actually honorable people in Westeros? That he's a Ned Stark analogue, albeit with his head still intact? That he's a respectable man, and solid as a rock?HBO
He's not the flashiest character, nor the funniest, nor the most frenetic. But Davos Seaworth is solid, and sometimes, solid's enough.
At the very least, he's not the worst character in 'Game of Thrones.' That spot's claimed.HBO
Yes, you did.HBO